Ask The Naruto Characters
by Reverie Hekako
Summary: Send in a question, and let it be answered! You've seen it here and there. But, now it's also for advice! Send a message to all of your favorite characters. Note: Please don't read if you hate stuff by bored authors. Rated T just to be safe.
1. Episode 1: Welcome!

Hello dear viewers!!!! Welcome to: **Ask The Naruto Characters**!!!!

A spin off (kinda) **Ask Sasuke** by **flynnfriend**. Please read her fanfic. It's wonderful! Anyways, since this is the first one, there isn't really anything we can do. So, we'll do a fake one. Also, if you're gonna ask a question, or ask for advice, please say who you're sending it to. Here is an example:

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_Dear Sakura,_

_Why do you like Sasuke?_

_Signed,_

_Annonymous_

"Well, dear reader, I like him because he's hot, and dark, and so mysterious!!!!" Sakura says. Her eyes begin to sparkle and she goes off into her little dream world.

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Ummm...yeah. Well, anyways, please send in questions! They will be answered as soon as possible.

Also, I would like to fit atleast 5 questions into each chapter. So, as soon as I get 5 reviews/questions, I'll update. If I get more than 5, I'll do that too. But, if I don't get 5, I won't update. Unless I haven't updated in forever! Please review!!

Ja ne

Note: Ja ne means bye in Japanese for those who don't know.


	2. Episode 2: The Beggining

Hello dear viewers!! Welcome to the next episode of Ask The Naruto Characters. Today we have several questions!

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**The next few questions are from InvaderTal.**

_Dear gaara,_

_Are you emo?_

_P.S. dont kill me _

Gaara twitches. "If you're informing that I cut myself. NO." Gaara is restraining himself from killing InvaderTal. "I have a dark past, but I'm not emo."

_Dear Sasuke,_

_Why does your hair look like a chicken/duck's butt?_

"It's natural." Sasuke says. He sounds a bit annoyed.

_Dear kankuro,_

_Are you single...will u date me?_

"I wish I could, you sound smexy." Kankuro says as he winks. You can all here Maye yelling from the backround. "But, sadly, the animation world is a bitch to me."

_Dear shikamaru,_

_Can you tutor me?_

"Nope. Too troublesome." Shikamaru says, with his usual bored look.

_Dear Lee,_

_Why must you act so yaoi?_

Lee sniffs. "I don't write the scripts! I'm forced to act youthful." he pauses. "Damn I'm smexy..."

**Ok...that was...mildly disturbing. These next questions are from lunarxshinobi.**

Dear all the peoples that Maye Uchiha has locked up in a cage where she's forcing you to answer her questions:

"HEY!!" Maye yells from the backround. Maye gets knocked out by Kakashi and dragged away.

_To Naruto,_

_Did you know that you're the cutest, smexiest, smartest, coolest, sweetest, strongest,fastest, bestest ninja ever?_

Naruto blushes. "Maybe..." does his uber smexy, foxy grin. Fangirls swoon.

_To SasUKE,_

_when will you admit that you're gay?_

"When hell freezes over." Sasuke says in an irritated voice. Kakashi is keeping Sakura from killing lunarxshinobi.

_To Gaara,_

_Do you still like to kill random people?_

Gaara shake's his head. "Not since I became Kazekage." (Sorry for the spoiler. But, we all knew it was gonna happen!) "I only kill those who attack my village." he sends an evil glare out to the attackers.

_To Neji,_

_What type of shampoo do you use?_

"Suave." Neji inquires. "It's only the best for my beautiful hair." he ruffles his hair. Fangirls swoon in the backround.

**Yet again, WEIRD. Anyways, the next question is from Alter-Ego11.**

_Dear Neji,_

_Do you play an instrument?_

Neji shakes his head. "No. I was thinking about playing the piano, but it took time away from training." he said.

* * *

Well, that's it folks! Hope you had fun!!

Ja ne


	3. Episode 3: Randomness

Welcome to another exciting episode of Ask The Naruto Characters!!! Sorrry that the show was a little delayed. The questions didn't come in too fast, and the writer had to go on a trip.

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**These next questions are from lunarxshinobi!**

_Yay! Thank you for answering my questions. An maye, I didn't mean that as an insult, so please don't be mad!_

Maye giggles. "Don't worry. I was just shoving some humor into this weird show." she smiles.

_To Naruto,_

_What's your secret to pwning SasUKE in every single way?_

Naruto grins. "That's simple! By training and eating a shut load of ramen!" He smiles and shows off his muscles. (Did I spell that right?)

_To Sasuke,_

_Is it true that you keep a shrine to Naruto's smexiness in you're closet?_

Sasuke scofs (I think that's how it's spelled). "Hell no!!!" looks around nervously. Everybody can see a certain Maye laughing her ass off in the backround.

_To Gaara,_

_Did you know what you're semxy too?_

Gaara nods. "Yeah. I learned that when I became kazekage." shudders. "So...many...fangirls." twitches.

_To Neji,_

_...um. okay... Is it true that your byakugan are just contacts?_

Neji nods. "It's not like a human can accually do that."

_To Kakashi,_

_WHY ARE YOU SUCH A PERV?!?_

Kakashi smiles behind his mask. "Well, I'm not much of a perv. I just like the books." laughs in a pervish matter.

"LOOK OUT!! THE PERVERTED SIDE OF KAKSHI IS OUT!!!" Maye yells. Kakashi knocks her out and drags her away.

**Erm...scary. Anwyays, the next question is from Marysmary.**

_To Sasuke:_

_Who do you like more, Karin or Sakura?_

"Umm..." Sasuke pauses. "Sakura. Karin is annoying." he pauses again. "Wait...the one from the show, right?" Sasuke says. He's accually confused for once!! Maye is laughing her ass off in the backround. (Note: The evil Maye (of ness) also has a fanfiction that has a girl named Karin in it, so Sasuke is currently confused because of that. Maye did this because she just loves to torture Sasuke.)

**Well...atleast that was...smart? Erm...anyways, the next questions are from tru-viet.**

_For Sakura,_

_Just becuase Ino likes Sasuke too, doesn't mean you two can't be friends...can it?_

"Well, dear reader, I wish we could be friends. But, that's rivalry for ya." Sakura says. She make's a depressing sigh.

_For Ino,_

_You did a good thing helping Sakura out, but can you be a little bit...how do I put this nicely...less bitchy?_

Ino sighs in an annoyed tone. "Sorry, but I was born that way!" she said. "I'm just like that." she does that hand movement that gay men do.

**...I'm not even gonna comment that. Anyways, the next questions are from tru-viet again...just in two different chapters. All well! We don't care. As long as it allows Maye to update this annoying thing.**

_To Tenten,_

_YOUR THE BEST KUNOICHI EVER!! SO...who do you like..(no) LOVE?_ (Note: We weren't sure if the no should be there, so we just put it in...whatever those are. MAYE!!! Become smarter!!!)

"Well..." Tenten pauses. "Neji of course!! He's so sexy!! Lee was ok...well, before he got that damn bowl cut. His hair was so cute!! But, I still like Neji." she smiles. "Also, thanks. I love comments!!!" she smiles even brighter.

_To Hinata,_

_Do you ever think you'll get a chance to confess to Naruto about your feelings about him?_

Hinata pushes her fingers together. "I-I h-hope s-so." she says, in a low voice. She turns redish.

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YAY!! Thanks for watching! Tune in next time everybody!

Ja ne!


	4. Episode 4: Questions AND dares!

Yay!!! Time for another exciting episode! We are getting alot of fast questions. Please tell your friends, and then I might be able to update faster. Thank you!

* * *

**These next questions are from InvaderTal, whose name reminds me of Invader Zim. Umm...yeah.**

_Dear naruto cast,_

_I feel like more questions...so sue me._

"Ok!!" The Naruto cast yells. Everybody turns to Tsunade. "Get the papers!!!" Everybody but Tsunade yells. Tsunade nods and runs away.

_Dear gaara,_

_Did you know that you are the coolest character ever? I only asked about the emo part because of my friend asked to ask._

Gaara shakes his head. "According to this weird book, Sasuke is the best. I'm like...maybe number 8..." he sniffs.

Naruto pats his back.

_Dear shikamaru,_

_Why are you a lazy bum?_

"Because life is troublesome." Shikamaru states. "Goodnight." he falls asleep at his little desk thingy.

Maye starts silently drawing on his face.

_Dear kankuro,_

_Will you atleast date my character kagami...She uses pupets with fragments of her soul._

Kankuro nods. "But only if she's as hot as you." he winks.

**...Kankuro you perv. Umm...anyways, the next questions are from lunarxshinobi...fun.**

_Yay! Besides, the best way to run these fanfics is to shove the characters in closets with no chances of escaping and forcing them to answer questions via a giant baseball bat. _

_... not that I'd know... no, I wouldn't know at all..._

Maye nods. "It's accually very usefull...except when Itachi escapes...that damn weasel..." she glares.

_To Naruto,_

_Really? cool. Is it true that no matter how many times your hair, or straighten your hair, or flatten it with gel, that it will ALWAYS pop back up again?_

Naruto nods. "It use to be flat. But...let's just say I got into a little accident." he puts up his finger and it's surging with electricity.

_To SasUKE,_

_You lie. I have a pic here. -shows all pic of sasuke's closet- Is it true that the last part of your name was on purpose?_

Sasuke grunts. "I'm gonna ignore those pictures...anyways, my last part was on purpose..blame my mother." he grummbles.

Maye smacks him for dissing his own AWSOME mother.

_To Gaara,_

_Is it true that you send Kankuro on wild goose hunts just to get rid of him?_

Gaara shakes his head. "No, I send him swimming with the sharks. I tell him that I dropped my teddy bear in the lake."

_To Neji,_

_..didnt expect you to admit that.. Want a chocolatey chipity cookie?_

Neji nods. "COOKIE!!" he falls over on the floor drooling. Men surround him. Most likely ANBU. xD

_To Kakashi,_

_-scoots away slowly- ok... Is it true that you help Jairaya with his 'research'?_

Kakashi shakes his head. "No, I only read the book." he grins.

**...no comment. Too disturbing. Well the next comments are from Dark Black Moonlight.**

_To Sasuke,_

_I dare you to kiss Sakura with passion!_

Sasuke glare's in annoyance. "No." he says, simply.

_To Sakura,_

_Is your hair naturally pink? I think you should get black highlights. That would look awesome!_

Sakura smiled. "Yep, it sure is natural!" she paused. "Wow! That would look awsome!" she smiled. "Thanks!"

_To Gaara,_

_If you had to go out with some one in that room, who would it be? I dare you to kiss that person!_

Gaara looks at the script. "Ummm...it would be...Maye." he blinked. "WHO WRITE'S THIS CRAP!?!"

Maye smiles. "Me."

_To Naruto,_

_I dare you to kiss Hinata on the lips!_

Naruto blushed. "Ummm...but..." he finally gathers all of his courage. "Ok!" he grabs Hinata and kisses her.

Maye skims through the script. "Hey...THAT ISN'T IN HERE!!" she growls. "Ah screw it!"

_To Hinata,_

_I dare you to tell Naruto your true feelings for him right now! How long have you liked him?_

Hinata's blushing like mad from the kiss. "I'VE LOVED YOU FOREVER NARUTO!" she faints.

Maye blinked. "Nice." smiles.

Neji nearly faints. "NOOO!!! MY COUSIN!!!"

Maye snickers. "A little over protective, eh?" smirks.

_To Tenten,_

_Do you make all of your weapons? Could you show me how to make some?_

Ten-Ten smiled. "Only a few. Most of them are made by my father. Well, pretty much you get a piece of metal, of your choice of course, then you shape it however you want to! But, it's too long to describe in this fanfic." she explains.

_To Neji,_

_How have you had your crush on tenten?_

Neji twitches. "Only if it's destiny."

Maye smirks. "It's destiny."

"Then yes!" Neji replies.

_To Ino,_

_Why don't you give up on Sasuke and go for Kiba? You look good with him!_

**(WARNING: This answer may contain spoilers for those who do not read the manga.)**

Ino shook her head. "No thanks. He might have fleas..." she shudders. "Beside's, Sai is sooooo much hoter!!" her eyes sparkle.

_To Shikamaru,_

_Do you have a crush on Temari?_

Shikamaru cocks a brow. "That troublesome woman? Hell no!!"

_That's all! I will write more questions! And please update soon Maye!_

Maye smiles widely. "I shall update now!!" she looks at the cast. "Now, say bye or I'll whip you all!!!!" she glares.

The Naruto cast whimpers and shudders. "Bye-bye." they all squeak.

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**Hey guys! Thanks for reading! I'm sorry this went kinda slow like. The comments were slow. Anyways, bye! Join us next ****time!**


	5. Three Cheers for Sweet RANDOMNESS!

YAY! Time for another exciting episode of Ask The Naruto Characters! Maye I should add 'and Maye' at the end. Nah. All well, here we go!

* * *

**These first few comments are from ****Dark Black Moonlight! I love her questions, I really do.**

_To Neji,_

_Why don't you cut your hair like a normal person? Although none of the Naruto cast really are normal._

Neji scoffed. "Because! My hair is so beautiful and silky."

Maye nods. "Sorry, but he has a point." she pauses. "I think."

_To Naruto,_

_What would you do if the world were extinct of ramen?_

Naruto pauses to think about that. "Well, there's only really one logical answer. Kill myself." he slowly takes out a knife.

_To Sakura,_

_Why don't you move on and try to get another guy? He is probably never going to like you and you totaly deserve some one that will always be there for you no matter what and Sasuke just oviously can't pull that off._

Sakura scratched her chin. "Well...it's just that...Sasuke's so cool! Beside's, I love him sooo much." she had sparkles in her eyes.

_To Sasuke,_

_I don't know what the other girls see in you. You are just a heartless jerk that cares for no one but your self. Sakura does totally deserve better than you. In fact any other girl that fell for you deserves better._

Sasuke rubs his eyes. "Thanks."

Maye blinks and coughs. "Ummm...well, since this guy is WAY too lazy to say anything...it was Itachi's fault. If Sasuke hadn't had his clan killed, he would be happy." she smiled widely.

_To Maye,_

_Again, Great job! Update soon!_

Naruto turns to Maye after reading it. "Hey, Maye! You accually got a letter!"

Maye smiles and runs over. "Awsome!" she starts reading it. She looks up and smiles. "No problem!" she does a thumbs up.

**The next questions are from ninetailedbeast97. He seemed to write to some of the Akatsuki members.**

_Dear Kisame,_

_Who are you parents, A goldfish and a freakman?_

_PS: Do you know the lochnees monster, if so tell her I said hi!_

Kisami sighed. "Yes, sadly, they are." he twitched. "You've been watching Fun With Akatsuki, haven't you? For all of you who aren't, go to youtube and search for that. Also, I'll tell her next time I visit."

**(Waring: These next few questions have spoilers in them. So, for those who aren't up to date in the manga, don't read them. Unless you want to.)**

_Dear Orochimaru,_

_How does it feel burning in hell after Sasuke killed you in the latest chapter? Also were you upset/suprised when he did kill you?_

Maye starts making the journey to hell. After four days, she makes it. "H-Here." she hands the letter to Orochimaru, then faints.

Orochimaru read it, then twitched. "It's not as pleasant. But, there are a few hot Uchiha's." he smirked and hissed. "I was surprised accully."

_Dear Sakura,_

_You and Naruto seem closer now that Sasuke is gone, do you think you could please date him?_

_PS: If not how about dating me?_

_PPS: (If you don't date Naruto or me I can delete all my fanfictions where you and Sasuke fall in love.)_

Sakura shook her head. "I would, but I don't write the series. I would date you, but I'm not aloud to leave the cage." she smiled. "Well, how nice. But, Sasuke is a bit emo. Even though he's pretty hot."

_Dear Akatsuki Leader,_

_Are you really the 4th Hokage A.K.A. Naruto's dad, if so the you are a sick twisted freak, trying to kill your own son like that!_

Leader sigh's. "I'm not his father. I'm accually just some random dude that they put in the series. Somebody accually put my picture together. Also, it has not been proven that the Fourth is Naruto's father. So, Maye would rather like it if you didn't post anything about that."

**(Note: The spoiler stuff is over.)**

_Dear Maye,_

_Please force the characters I wrote to to wirte me back in chapter 5. Your dedicated Reader NinetailedBeast97._

Maye smiled widely. "No problem, I already did." she laughed evily, then coughed. "Thank for reading!" she smiles.

**Well that was...weird. Anyways, the next questions are from our newest reader, Lover Of Animes.**

_Dear Shino,_

_WHY THE HELL WON'T ANYONE GIVE YOU QUESTIONS FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!?!? (did it by random) Anyway...my character Amayne really and I mean REALLY likes you. (she's when I drew her on paper she drew you in a heart -shudders- no offense) She has a passion for bugs so would you date her if she was in the anime/manga? (she's pwretty -)_

Shino adjust's his glasses. "I'm not sure. It's kinda like asking why nobody will send anything to Deidara. Anyways, I suppose I would. It's possible."

_Dear Neji,_

_What would really piss you off? a) People singing "You Spin Me Round (Like a Record)" around you every single time. Or, b) Cutting your hair into the spiky look while you sleep?_

Neji twitches. "Definatly B. I have no problem with the song, but it would probably get annoying sooner or later. Yet, I love my hair sooo much."

_Dear Naruto,_

_FINALLY YOU KISSED HINATA! Ok umm, has Hinata woke up yet?_

Naruto smiles widely. "Thanks, she's over there by Maye." points at them.

_Dear Hinata,_

_(if your awake) WOO GO GIRL!! How does it finally feel to feel Naruto's lips? XDD_

Hinata blushed. "It feels...good. But, his lips tasted like ramen."

_Dear Maye,_

_(the host) Please tell me your ways of pissing off Sasuke. -grins evily- Because I really feel that Sasuke should be punished of trying (or suceeded) of being a betraying Kohona! -gets my trusty shuriken- YOU ROCK OUT LOUD MAYE!_

Maye smiled widely. "Well, it's simple. You gotta tell him how terrible he is compared to Itachi. Since he's in a cage, he can't reach you. He'll run out of energy, and then you merely flick him on the head. Well, bye now, and thanks!" she winks.

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Ok, I know I don't have five readers yet. So, please tell your friends. Also, I'm so happy to say that we got a new readon.

Ja ne!


	6. PICKLES PICKLES!

Hello everybody! Sorry I haven't been posting lately. But finally, I am! I'll also be uploading AUL and a new story. YAY!

Disclaimer: I do not own the cage that the Naurto characters are put in...nor do I own them. I'm just renting.

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**These first questions are from The Muffinator 3!**

_To Everyone,_

_Who here likes muffins?_

I raise my hand. "I do. BLUEBERRY!" I twitch.

_To Everyone,_

_What is a viola?_

Everybody grunts. "A musical instrument simular to a violin but slighty bigger...or smaller...can't remember. Anyways, it has a lower tone, and it's part of the strings.

_To Everyone,_

_Who thinks my questions are random?_

Everybody raises thier hands.

**The next questons are from killr noob. It's a noob...AND IT KILLS! AHHHH!!**

_Dear Naruto,_

_Did you ever try to get in the girl's shower with your jutsu? Did it work?_

Naruto nodded. "Yes! I did try. But...it didn't work." He frowned. "Not even the first time." He sniffed.

_Dear Jiraiya,_

_Did you ever want to date Tsunade?_

Jiraiya nodded. "Yes, when we were little." He replied.

**The next ones are from ninetailedbeast97...sweet.**

_Dear Itachi,  
why didn't you leave a girl alive instead of Sasuke, girls are much weaker, except for Sakura._

Itachi sighs and crosses his arms. "Because then I wouldn't have much of a challenge, and that would bore me." He said. "And don't underestimate women." He said, shuddering slighlty.

_Dear Sai,  
Why do you make fun of Naruto's "you know what", I think the reason is that you are jealous that he actually has one and you don't._

Sai smiled his fake smile. "Have you even seen his or my you know what?" He asked.

_Dear Zetsu,  
I have a nice fern in my yard you might want to meet._

Zetsu smiled. "Really? Ferns are sexy!"

_Dear Ino,  
You can escape from Maye, use the mind transfer jutsu on her!_

Ino smirked. "You're right! Mind transfer no jutsu!"

Maye dodges it. "It may be a good move, but it's easy to dodge." Smiles.

_Dear Fourth Hokage,  
Why did you pick Naruto to seal the Kyubi inside?_

The fourth hokage shrugs. "Because spoiler spoiler spoiler and so on." He replies.

_Dear Konohomaru,  
Are you still scared of Sakura, I don't blame you if you are._

Konohamaru nods. "Yes! That woman is a freak! A strong freak!"

_Dear Kyuubi,  
If you are a female why do you sound like a male? Why didn't you just eat Yondaime before he could seal you?_

Kyuubi growls. "Who says I'm a male? Or a female? I'M JUST A FOX! Anwyays, that guy is too strong. He has a giant toad for goodness sake! JUST LOOK AT HIM!"

**This one is from HoldMeTight123. No! I won't. Too busy.**

_To Kiba,  
How old is Akamaru? Does he shed? What kinda dog is he?_

Kiba shrugs. "Lost track. Yes, every dog does. Ninja dog." He replies.

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Well that wraps it up. Please write! Or leave a comment...WHATEVER! 


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